An Older Female Travelling Solo in Asia
I'm constantly asked why I chose to travel alone, especially as an older female. "What about safety?" "Why not wait for someone to keep you company?" "Don't you get lonely?" The questioning is relentless.
Whether single, coupled or in a group, to me, travel is one of the most rewarding pastimes anyone can do. Augustine's quote sums it up perfectly: "The world is a book, and those who do not travel, read only a page."
I vowed years ago that not having a partner to travel with or to protect me wasn't going to deter me or my wanderlust from seeing how the rest of the world lived, worked, and played.
I travelled for work (often at the drop of a hat), so my suitcase was always ready. My holidays were usually for a minimum of six weeks (one can waste around five days travelling to and from my home base of Australia). While most of these were also alone, I often caught up with friends living overseas during the holiday.
Footprints in the sand on Hoi An beach, Vietnam. Image: © Nannette Holliday
When I took early retirement in 2009, that suitcase and I took off on one long holiday. Personal items went into storage. I rented my apartment, and friends threw me a huge farewell party. I had no plans of returning soon, if ever.
The world was my oyster, and I love oysters!
Many thought I was mad, even though they wouldn't say it directly to my face. But most wanted to be in my shoes.
For the first time in my life, I had no set plan or preconceived outcome in mind. However, I knew my retirement funds wouldn't allow me to cruise the world in the style that I cherished. Plus, I'm not a lover of group tours, and prices for single supplement are exorbitant.
I've never been a backpacker. My own room, bathroom and privacy have always been my preference. Loving my own company and a great organiser, I'm the perfect candidate for solo travel.
Relaxing on my own by the poolside in Bali. Image: © Nannette Holliday
After living in France for six months, I joined a global house-sitting organisation. The house-sits provided me with the perfect bases for discovering cities, regions and countries I'd only ever dreamed of visiting. House-sitting assisted in spreading my limited income much further. I never pay for accommodation or utilities, only my food and any travel in exchange for looking after people's homes and furry friends.
More extended house-sits allowed me to assimilate as a 'local', really getting to know its people, food, and culture. I'd venture to other parts of the country or nearby neighbouring countries before and after the house sit, visiting the more immediate surrounds during the sit.
To date, I've ticked 45 destinations off my bucket list this way and visited a total of 89 countries during my lifetime. I still reconnect with friends if I'm ever within their domain, and vice-versa, many friends visit me (wherever I may be).
Sunset view from an apartment-sit in Penang, Malaysia. Image: © Nannette Holliday
These days most people ask me where am I going next? Then their response is: "I can't wait to see your photos and read your Facebook posts."
Have I ever been afraid?
Weary, more than afraid.
Male friends repeatedly told me not to go to Turkey alone. It wasn't safe for white females. Previously, whenever I'd had the opportunity to travel there, my friends didn't. By 2014, I was sick of waiting. I accepted a house sit in Bodrum, on Turkey's west coast, looking after a pampered puss for four weeks in February.
High on a hill overlooking the town and harbour, the home was enormous, comfy and had a big wood fireplace in the lounge on the second level that kept the whole house warm.
As a writer, provided I have internet, I can work from anywhere. My only issue in Bodrum was when storms took out the internet. After several days and checking with neighbours, I called the provider to see when it would be operational. Their response was: "It will be fixed when it will be fixed."
Freshly squeezed orange juice at a café in Bodrum. Image: © Nannette Holliday
Catching a bus to town, I found a café that allowed me to use their internet, even providing an extension cord so I could spend all day doing my ‘work’. They fed me, kept me hydrated and chatted in between busy times. This lasted for ten days, but I still visited regularly afterwards. Their freshly squeezed orange juice rivalled my dad's, and they cooked newly caught fish from the boat across the road for my final night's dinner. I made lasting friendships in Bodrum.
Afterwards, I chose a 14-day bus tour around Turkey. I'm not a group or bus tourist type, but I still had reservations about keeping safe. With only 15 others (a family and couples) on a 40-seater coach, I couldn't have been happier. We often had longer times in most places too. Only the family missed the pickup once. After waiting over 30 minutes and also looking for them, the guide told the driver to leave. The family caught up while we were having lunch. They were never late again.
So much for my caring friend's advice. I never felt threatened anywhere in Turkey. Not even Istanbul, where I spent another week.
Having visited Morocco and the UAE many times, I always ensure I dress modestly and adhere to these countries’ religious rules. Why become a target unnecessarily? Thankfully, I've also never been mugged, had my purse or personal items stolen.
A foot bath in mineral waters in Turkey. Image: © Nannette Holliday
I'm incredibly mindful of my surroundings, pack items carefully, and ensure the things I need most are easily accessible without displaying my bag's entire contents. I also check maps and directions before stepping out and carry a hardcopy map and my hotel card in both English and the native language of the country.
I also leave a copy of my itinerary with friends at home. Once I've booked my airfares, I organise transportation from the airport, especially if arriving after dark or early morning, and my first few night's accommodations. This ensures a relaxed beginning to the new adventure and time to familiarise myself with my surroundings.
The best part of travelling solo means I never have everything planned to a 'T'. As I fill in any gaps along the way, I email details back to my friends. That way, they're not worried either.
I love exploring laneways and off the beaten track, but if a particular area of the town is a known 'hot spot', I don't tempt fate. I'll usually only venture there with a personal driver or guide if I must see it. It's worth paying a local to look after you.
Cooling down with a frozen cocktail in Bali. Image: © Nannette Holliday
When I'm travelling alone, my senses are heightened. I'm more aware of my surroundings, and I notice more — the buildings, architecture, nature and what other people around me may also be doing. I savour these moments. While I admit, it would be wonderful to share those moments, when I have had a companion, I find I'm more distracted by their wants, needs or prattle to be free to absorb my surroundings fully.
I'll admit travelling solo does push you out of your comfort zone. However, other people are more likely to talk to you, and you to them, when you are alone in an airport, restaurant, café, bar or on tour. I have many friends around the world I've met this way. But you can easily control whether you want to continue the conversations or not if necessary.
Travelling solo is rewarding and liberating. It's helped me find myself, made me more resilient and confident.
I love being in charge of my own schedule — it makes it an actual holiday. When I only have to consider myself, I've never missed out on a good deal either (from waiting for another travel companion to make up their mind).
I choose what I want to do, when I want, and at my pace.
Sunset drinks with a friend at Kusadasi, Turkey. Image: © Nannette Holliday
Even if travelling with friends now, I only subscribe to their wish list if it interests me. Likewise, I never force them to do what I treasure most, either. I can also discover the epicurean delights of the place I'm visiting without having to worry about a fussy friend who won't survive without McDonald's. And on flights, I don't have to feel guilty if I get an upgrade and they don't.
Also, if I do make a mistake, it's my own fault. I don't have to worry about a companion freaking out.
When travelling around South Korea, I'd forgotten about the Chinese New Year. All trains, buses and planes from Busan were fully booked when I'd planned to travel back to Seoul for my flight home. After a few gruelling hours, I found an earlier train, additional accommodation in Seoul and secured a refund from my current accommodation. These days I check all public holidays thoroughly.
I found South Korea one of the most welcoming countries, particularly as a solo female traveller. I never felt threatened or afraid even when I got lost and found myself in some non-descript back alley. Non-English-speaking locals often resting on a tiny stool at their backdoor would smile widely, offer me tea, and point the way back to civilisation.
Pet-sitting a friendly pooch in Daejeon, South Korea. Image: © Nannette Holliday
Other Asian countries I've had many friendly and outstanding journeys through solo include Singapore, Malaysia, Japan, Timor Leste, Bali, Brunei, Nepal, UAE and Vietnam, especially the north from Hanoi to Hoi An.
While I didn't encounter any personal issues in China and enjoyed it culturally, I found the people too pushy and harsh in their actions for my liking. I discovered similar experiences in Bangkok when there for work, so I've never had a huge desire to return. Although the more I read about northern Thailand, my interest is spiking.
High on my Asian bucket list when international travel resumes are Sri Lanka, Maldives and return visits to Vietnam and South Korea.
One thing I can tell you — solo female travellers know what they want in life. Our lives are anything but dull and, at the least, intriguing. We treasure time, value every moment, each experience, and the people we meet along the way. Every day is an adventure waiting to happen. I certainly have no regrets about choosing my solo travelling lifestyle.
Header image: © Nannette Holliday
